Life has been so strange lately.  In the past 5 months I've been emptied; released from the bricks upon my chest and I'm learning.  I'm learning so much about myself.  I'm developing a renewed love for myself; an understanding.  My senses are so open.  I'm seeing everything in a different light.  I'm realizing how deeply I love art; how deeply I love to write poetry; how deeply I want to learn to play guitar.  My desire to write my own songs is strong; fierce.  And I'm patient.  I have so much patience.  There are no deadlines.  There is no rush.  And time... I have so much more time now than I ever seemed to have before.  Maybe it's the lack of my past investments; thoughts, worry.  In any case, I have so much time.  Time to spend recording my poetry in the sketchbook I bought.  Time to practice scales on my guitar.  Time to watch sports I was never into before.  I don't know who I'm becoming, but I like her/me.  She's laid back and she loves life. Things are so much more calm now.  It's almost an eerie calm.  As if I'm just floating through life.  I'm weak; both emotionally and physically.  I've been drained; cut from the chaos and unfamiliar with this peace I find myself in.  It's different.  Things are changing.  Things are good.

This is my poetry stacked by year... over 10 years worth.
The earliest poem I have record of is from 1996.



The red notebook has poetry from 2005, 2007, 2008 and 2009...
The stack next to the brown journal (also seen in the middle above) are dateless poems.



The brown journal only has a handful of poems from 2008....



Everything stacked... but not including poems on my hard drive.



And this is the sketchbook I plan on using to consolidate all of my poetry.
I bought it today :)

i think i'm a guy at heart.

my adrenalin was through the roof for this world series.  every game, i would get jittery HOURS before the game even started.  but now that it's over, i crave the rush of excitement again.

i'm a philadelphia fan... the city and the sports.  across the board, i stand for philly.
and tonight, the Sixers and the Flyers both have a game.
and sunday the Eagles are playing.

and let me just tell you.

i.can't.wait.